Paul writes: "In your anger do not sin" (Eph 4:26 NIV). What do Paul's words mean? Don't let your anger escalate to the point of doing damage. Don't use your words as a weapon or a control mechanism. It's okay to express our emotions in a healthy way, but keep them in check. Our goal must be to resolve the problem and strengthen the relationship, not "sound off" and wound the other person. Is this easy to do? No. We'll need a good strong dose of grace to do it.
Words spoken in jest, sarcasm, self-righteousness or "righteous indignation" wound people, sometimes permanently. "Perverseness [of the tongue] breaks the spirit." (Pr 15:4 NKJV). "A crushed spirit who can bear?" (Pr 18:14 NIV). "The tongue can bring death" (Pr 18:21 NLT). Angry words, once unleashed, can: "Go down into a man's inmost parts" (Pr 26:22 NIV). Our words can live in the heart and memory of a person and go all the way to the grave with them.
We say, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me," but it's not true. A person can die of a crushed spirit, and the one who spoke the words can live to regret the damage they inflicted and never get a chance to undo it. On the other hand, anger properly handled never needs to be repented of.
So let's learn to differentiate between the anger we feel and the words we speak. Anger carefully thought through, can reveal important information about needed changes. Let's focus on that, and ask God to show us what needs changing in the other person - and us! Be Blessed!
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Anger carefully thought through, can reveal important information about needed changes. Let's focus on that, and ask God to show us what needs changing in the other person - and us! At the age of 54 soon to be 55 I am just now learning this. This is a powerful teaching. I continue to be scarred by others in my life and have no doubt scarred others myself. I pray for the grace and Spiritual intellect to be a change agent without leaving a mark.
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